Before everyone hears about my Spring Break Adventure with the girls, I wanted to get some ideas and feelings out that have been caught up in a mix of uncertainty but oh so familiar.
Why is it that always the ones we love, the good ones seem to be taken from us oh so soon. I never really got to know my Poppa but at the time I did not understand the concept of what I had lost. Now I do. But I also realize what I have gained from the loved ones my family has lost. The next death that shook my family was when we lost Al and following his wife Kathy. Kathy and Al both always came to our Christmas party and brought us girls a little something every year. Many times it was something that Kathy made us, today we treasure those ornaments. Being in junior high when they were taken from this earth to become complete in Heaven was still hard to understand. From losing them I became a lot closer with their girls, who are my cousins. (They're a few years younger than my mom) And during the year an half to about two years I was seeing them more often. After Al died we became a little closer, but it was after Kathy passed that we really began to see them more.
I can remember going to one of the funerals and Krissy telling me that we were seeing each other too much under the wrong circumstances. She was very true.
While their parents are now up in Heaven with my Poppa, probably playing some cards, we were missing them so much here. Even though I know we would probably be close with Kim and Kris even if Kathy and Al were alive, they mean so much to more to me and I know how much we mean to them.
Kim was my Confirmation sponsor, we got to work during MCREST and explore the Catholic faith somewhat together. And from that I became to see how special she was to our family. Kris and the kids have always been fun to hang out with as well. And Rachael picked Krissy for her sponsor just two years later.
We love to camp together, when we do. Play cards at Christmas and visit during graduation parties. We don't see each other as much as I would love to . Hopefully this summer we can get camping again with them.
This past weekend though I felt as if we were back to the years of when Kathy and Al passed away. We were gathered together for a memorial service to remember Matt. They were once again grieving a loved one and we were there. The minute I saw them I remembered what Krissy had told me years ago.
From all of this I have gained so much love from them and love when we do get together. While Kim especially grieves this loss, I think about how much they have lost. How much their kids have missed out on, not having a set of grandparents around. Grandparents that I know would have spoiled those kids to death. I did lose out on knowing my Poppa, but I did get to know Kathy and Al in a way that is special to me. I hang my heart ornament each year thinking about how much I loved seeing them. Kathy's beautiful hand writing on the ornament keeps memories of her in our lives forever. Now Kim buys us an ornament each year that I love to hang as well. See their kids will never get to have those special ornaments that their grandma made us, and it makes me sad. But they do know how much their grandparents loved them and all about them.
From each death I have grown to see how much I have gained from a tragic loss. In this case its the love of family that has brought us together each and every time.
I love Kim, Kyle, Krissy, Carl, Jessica and Jacob. They are a great part of my family that I would not want to miss out getting to know them.
Love Kelly
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